First Advisor

Janice Lee

Term of Graduation

Spring 2020

Date of Publication


Document Type

Closed Thesis

Degree Name

Master of Fine Arts (M.F.A.) in Creative Writing


Creative Writing



Physical Description

1 online resource (iii, 217 pages)


"There But Not But There" is a novel written in fragments and short vignettes. The narrative is a collage of the first and third person points of view, as well as a series of ancillary texts, including magazine articles and email exchanges. Through this network of overlapping and merging lenses and narrative registers, the novel explores the complexities of the grieving process, the warped dimensions affected by psychological disturbance, and the individual's attempt to disappear, dissociate and detach from the self. Over the course of the novel, the unnamed protagonist, or first person narrator, travels through lived, dreamt, fantasized, and imagined realms as she attempts to reconcile her father's betrayal and her mother's suicide.


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Note: This thesis is only available to students, staff and faculty at Portland State University.

Persistent Identifier